Cancer is a fucktard of the highest magnitude!

On this, my 2nd post, I'd like to get serious. 

 For Antoinette  -

 I would like to just talk about a girl I knew briefly, long ago. Her name, Antoinette. We were roommates down at UM (that's University of Miami) hospital and I was (big shock) unhappy.. she however was all smiles... only infuriated me more. I was not allowed to eat anything at all; and that night her family brought her DVDs to watch movies, while eating the KFC they also brought her.  I got angrier and angrier with each enjoyable bite she took. She was all smiles, laughing the whole time.
   Later that night I heard horrible noises coming from behind her closed partition. I got up, dragged my sick IV connected body over to her side and saw something I'll never forget. She was thrashing around and her eyes were rolled back in her head. I ran as fast as I could into the hall and yelled for help. In ran a nurse who stood frozen watching this poor girl dying. I looked from the nurse, staring at Antoinette, back to Antoinette, who had minutes, possibly seconds left, and couldn't believe what I was seeing.   I ran back into the hall and as far down the hall you could get, practically on the other side of the hospital, I saw white coats. I yelled at the top of my lungs and they ran into the room,  then immediately called in a code blue for her. They saved her. She lived. The next day I found out that Antoinette spent almost every day of her whole life in a hospital. The cancers that plagued her could never be squelched. That night she was getting, yet another dose of very dangerous, experimental medication. She would be a human guinea pig in hopes she and others could be helped. It almost killed her. A very short time later, I was back there, at UM, having my own radiation treatment (where you have to drink it from a vial, then be sequestered). When I could finally leave, my brain was a bit addled, I was very weak from it and words were hard to find. That's when Antoinette and her huge smile rolled past me in a wheel chair and she reached out to touch me, yet I recoiled (not because of her - because I was still slightly radioactive and touching me exposed you to a dose of something like a x-ray) of course, in her case, it wouldn't have mattered... but, in my state I wasn't thinking properly and  I couldn't get the words out. About a week later or so, I was back for follow up and wanted to see her, to apologize, to explain, to talk to her, anything with her...
My Dr. told me she died.
I will NEVER forget Antoinette Scaradino and her smile... her ONLY desire in life was to go to Disney World and she never got to, because cancer wouldn't allow it. I can't thank Antoinette enough for teaching me about being judgmental and to try to be happy for others, no matter what. For being genuinely thrilled for others who are eating something they enjoy, for doing something they enjoy...
Life is very short. Live it well for Antoinette.